AM I IN THE WRONG OR HIM??? OR BOTH??

Question

Long story short this guy who ive been seeing for a short while and I planned on going to the movies last night. We originally planned to see queen and slim at 10:20. When we made plans it was 7/8ish pm and i told him after i turn in assignment I had ill get ready. Honestly i got ready really fast but didn't leave my place until 10:0 something pm and I got to the theatre at around 10:45 but then I got confused on parking, which made it 11. I understand why but this guy was really mad at me. We drove separately so when i was confused about parking, he drove where i was to show me where he meant but he let how he was feeling reflect on how he drove so as i was following, him he was doing that thing with the engine and speeding. When we got inside the movies there was nothing on and the ones that played, were 20 min in. He kept making a fuss and then he went on a little rant about how late i am and how there's no movies playing then I asked what to do since he was saying how he really didn't want to watch the movies listed, which made him go on another rant about how i never know what I want to do and how i always leave it up to him but that's not all the way true and how he wanted to see a movie from the beginning if he's paying for it. It was just a night that i feel like it was a waste of my time and maybe he felt that too but I say that cuz he was acting up by hitting things and he wouldn't even hug me. When i asked for one it was some half ass hug and during the movies I could feel some tension. I'm just disappointed cuz he wasted that time for us on being mad and distant from me. Like he didn't drop it and just enjoy me. Then at the end of the movie when it was time to go our separate ways he didn't say anything until i did and the vibe was still weird. I know it's my fault since i was late and I understand that he was mad but am I wrong for thinking he didn't have to let that ruin the whole mood? Usually after we meet and im home, i would get the "im home did u make it back ok?" Text but nothing! Idk how this will hinder us. What do i do? Or not do?

Accepted Answer

I mean, I get irrationally angry about being late to movies too. I can’t stand it. It annoys the heck out of me. 
You communicated your priorities by being late. I’m not saying that’s wrong. But someone would certainly feel some type of way about it and it could definitely set a bad tone for the evening. Should he have been more mature? Yeah. But I guess I don’t see his response as outrageous given it all sort of started with your time management issues.

Answer

I think you were in the wrong. You were almost 40 minutes late. It shows poor time management on your behalf. I wouldn't want to continue with the plans either if my date were that late for a movie. He could have probably handled it better, though. But in the end, I feel this could've been avoided had you planned better.

Answer

You were really late. You can't really do that for a movie...

Answer

Yeah no, you’re definitely in the wrong. You can’t be that late to a movie. I’m surprised he stayed at all, I would have cancelled the date entirely after you were that late. I’m not going to pay to watch a movie that I don’t even know what’s going on in because I missed the first 40 minutes

Answer

I agree he overreacted a bit, but I would have been upset too. Especially if you didn't let him know you'd be late. Just saying you'd be there after an assignment was done isn't really a good indication of what to expect time-wise. Especially if you said that more around 7/8. People make time for the things they care about, and if you didn't take the time to text or call him at, say, 10 and let him know that you're really sorry, but you're just now leaving and will be there around 10:45, then he has every right to be upset. He probably got there a few minutes early, say 10:15 ish, and then sat around for 30 minutes wondering where the heck you were, and if you were even coming. That would have been extremely frustrating, especially once it was late enough for him to realize it was too late for the 10:20 showing you planned on. 
Yeah, he could have been a little more calm about it once you were there, but I definitely don't blame him for being upset.

Answer

So he was hitting things??? Did I read that right?

Answer

I don’t think he should’ve got THAT mad about it, but people with poor time management skills really annoy me too.

Answer

He is showing you how he deals with situations. Every time yall have a disagreement do you want to deal with that behavior ?

Answer

That just shows what type person he is and if you guys do end up together shows how he would be and maybe worse I’d move on just my opinion.

Answer

If I was him I wouldn’t have waited that long for someone I haven’t been with that long. Being late for movies makes no sense to me and it stresses me out too especially since movies are so expensive. If you knew you were going to be late I think it would’ve been more respectful of his time to message and suggest a different date that wasn’t time sensitive. “I’m sorry but it looks like I’m going to be later than I thought and I don’t want to watch half a movie, do you want to do dinner instead? I’d love to go see this with you another time.” And send that at like 10 when you already know you’re gonna be late. 
It sounds to me like he had other issues going on that day and the movie was the last straw. You don’t have to like how he gets angry and he doesn’t have to like how you live less attached to a schedule than him. You’re just not compatible and that’s what dating is all about figuring out! Move on.

AM I IN THE WRONG OR HIM??? OR BOTH??

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