Conflicted

I need help. I met someone in may and I caught feelings for them big time and got really close with them and then they moved away for university in September, it hurt a lot and we still talk everyday. I started to move on and I have been hanging out and talking with a new guy a lot and we’re pretty close to being in a relationship but I still have a lot of pain tucked away from the prior situation. I called him drunk and told him I loved him and he is coming home tonight for Christmas. I don’t know what to do, I want to see him but I’m scared that it won’t be closure and that instead all the feelings will come back and hurt me more. Please tell me what to do I am so confused