Sooo awhile back I posted a confession that I had accidentally seen my best friends older brother naked but I never updated what happened later on....

For more context my mom and I had gone and seen some old family friends and have a girls weekend since my friends older brothers are away at college and my friends dad was going to be out of town for something as well so we thought it was going to be perfect until my besties brother Peter ended up showing up as a surprise for his parents and his sister, not knowing we’d be there visiting.

How I ended up seeing him naked was because his college is out of state he flew in and decided to take a shower but forgot his bag that had everything in it so his mom asked me to take and put it in his room since she and my mom were cooking dinner and my friend was feeding their dogs. So I did and I went into his room fully thinking he was in the shower since it had been a few minutes and I heard the shower running, so I put his bag near the bathroom door but when I was turning around to leave I knocked one of his trophies off his dresser onto the floor and was going to pick it up when I heard the bathroom door slid open and there he stood completely naked and for some weird ass reason I followed up from seeing his bare feet/legs all the way up so I ended up seeing every bit of him(as well as making eye contact) as I was picking the trophy up. Then I proceeded to put the trophy down on his dresser and said I’m so sorry like ten times as I ran out of his room. But what I confessed was I couldn’t stop thinking about how he was bigger than I imagined even though I never imagined his big he WOULD be, but I still couldn’t stop thinking about him!

But, even though it was so awkward after the whole thing happened, later that night when I was getting ready for bed we actually ended up having sex because he came to my room and told me he couldn’t stop thinking about me seeing him naked and it turned him on in a weird way and the sex was pretty great actually. I wasn’t expecting it to be great considering the past few times I’ve had sex before him it wasn’t great since the guy I was with didn’t even know that a girl can’t properly have a orgasm by getting kissed and having a guy enter her. But Peter(my friends brother) knew exactly what he was doing, where he was touching and where he was kissing and it felt so good and he seemed pretty happy with himself that he made me feel so good too.

But after we had sex he cuddled me because I got cold because the A/C was on full blast and I ended up falling asleep with him and it was so awkward waking up next to him because I was like “Oh my God I just had sex with my besties older brother and her room is legit 6 feet away from us!” I felt so weird in the moment but then he decided to wake up and smiled at me so cutely that the weirdness I felt went away.

That morning when we went out for breakfast we acting like we were before(which was us just being super awkward with each other even though we were definitely comfortable with each other now).

Then came Sunday morning and my mom and I had to start getting ready to leave and while I was packing more of my things up in the room I was staying in, Peter came into see if he could help in anyway and when I said no, he asked me before I left if he could have my number and if it would be okay if he maybe texted me every now and then and I gave it to him almost immediately because I wanted to ask him for his number too. I didn’t want it to honestly just be us hooking up and then that be it because it felt more than that to me.

But ever since then we talk at least three to four times a week and that’s more than I even talk to his sister!

My birthday just passed a couple of weeks ago as well and he texted me at like 7:00 in the morning a audio message and it was him softly singing happy birthday to me as he was walking to his first class and wishing me wonderful day and asked if he could call me later. Of course I thought him singing me the happy birthday song through a audio message was super cute and said thank you of course, and said I would absolutely love it if we called me later. Of course we didn’t end up talking until like 10:00 because of my birthday party not ending until around 9:00 then not getting back home and ready for bed until that time.

But we ended up talking for three hours and it only felt like maybe 30 minutes at most? I’ve honestly never talked to a guy on the phone for that long before. And I’m starting to think a little crush I had on him is turning into more deeper feelings because every time I see a text message from him I get giddy almost. Or when I’m having a really shitty/long day he’s the first person that pops into my head of who I want to talk to and vent about it too. And he listens to it all and comforts me. And when he’s had his own shitty/long day he’ll either call me up or send me a audio message about it and I comfort him in the best way I can.

But because of all of that and how much we talk he’s always on my mind and I’m honestly afraid of my possibly deeper feelings for him because if I do indeed have deeper feelings, do I tell him and possibly ruin a good thing that going on or do I not tell him and just keep the feelings to myself. Or there is the possibility that he could have feelings for me too and then we become a couple? But if that happens then Idek how I would tell or even explain that to his sister on how we even decided to swap phone numbers.

I’m thinking way too far ahead here but I seriously have no idea what to do about my feelings or even how to feel about them.