TMI for husbands?

Question

Hey ladies! I was wondering what your experiences have been with explaining all the ins and outs (literally, haha) of TTC. I've shared some information with my husband and he seems to get annoyed and said that it should just happen naturally without "trying" too hard, but it doesn't really work that way with needing to BD during ovulation, of course.

I started to share more information and it just seems to overwhelm him and he said he feels like a tool that is just a means to an end.

What have your experiences been like with sharing TTC tips, and details about OPKs, others tips and tricks with husbands and significant others?

Answer

I can't give advice regarding OPKs because I've never bothered with them; I'd feel like a mad scientist with beakers and urine samples, lol. 
My guy just wanted to know when I was ovulating so we could BD and honestly, that's how we've conceived each time. But..we make sure to have sex the day BEFORE my ovulation day because you're actually most fertile then 😉.
Most guys don't really want to know all the little details that go into TTC; they need the simplest, most basic instructions/info. Keep it easy and stress-free!

Answer

Depends on the guy! But I wouldn't go into much detail with him.. Could make him freak. My partner wants us to just have fun and let nature take its course- which is how it should be really but it is very difficult when you want it so much! So I keep a track of my most fertile days and initiate the sex during them but making him feel wanted instead of "just doing it because I'm fertile" but we also have great sex throughout the whole month 😊

Answer

I'm gonna start TTC in December n honestly will prob delete this app before I start so I don't know when I'm ovulating bc I don't want the stress n the over thinking of it all. I'd rather just enjoy the BD and when it happens it happens. I already have two kids n never knew when I was ovulating for those two. From being on here it sounds like it's true that the harder u try the more u stress and the longer it takes to get pregnant it sounds like ur husband is right.

Answer

My hubby knows all the details and not just from me but from reading on the subject. And after unsuccessfully "actively trying" for some time, he asked me to relax and just enjoy each other. So that cycle I got pregnant.

Obviously you need to have sex near your ovulation, but I don't see the need to wave the ovulation test in his face. There are settle things you can do. Even using preseed doesn't have to be in the guy's face.

Of course if you've been trying for over a year that's a different story.

Answer

To be frank, his and your reproductive health should be at the forefront of your concerns. Take him with you to the OB and have them do a preconception check up. From there the two of you can ask questions and create a fertility action plan.

For me, my husband knee I was going to have difficulty conceiving when he first met me. And him being him, has been all for helping me be more fertile and suffer fewer symptoms of PCOS and endometriosis. He can now explain ovulation, ovarian cyst growth, he's an excellent player 2 in my life long fertility prep plan.

BUT there are very few people like him, and sometimes both you and a doctor need to explain why he should care about your mucus and why sometimes just "doing it naturally" isn't always going to work. Getting pregnant for most people is actually quite difficult.

Answer

I found it way better to do all the crazy CM and CP check alone and never talked about it to him. I didn't even let him know when I was ovulating. I would just initiate sex when I knew the time was right. It made it way less stressful for him.  I keep sex fun and just because I wanted to have sex. It worked perfect for us, got my bfp with no stress lol. Good luck.

Answer

I've had similar experiences with my husband. I'm using the NFP method to prevent, and every time I talk about it or try to explain it, he seems to get somewhat frustrated. I realize I repeat myself a lot, but I'm new to the method and sometimes feel like I need to talk to him about it to make sure I understand it. He's been supportive, don't get me wrong, but I think there are parts of a woman's cycle that are just too difficult for him to understand because he can't relate. I've backed off a lot with the conversation about it, and I only tell him what he needs to know, unless he asks. Maybe try logging your information and knowing where you are but not telling him every detail. You don't have to tell him, "hey, it's my fertile window" to get him to cooperate.  ;)

Answer

my fiancé likes to know everything, we talk about bowel movements, cm any of that stuff and he barely reacts. it's good to be able to share all the ins and outs. if your man doesn't want to hear it then tell us! I could understand how it might make him feel uncomfortable. just let him know how you feel!

Answer

This happened with my partner. I told in about the dates etc and he freaked out. He has now decided he isn't ready for a baby.

Answer

My husband knows the ins and outs of it so to speak lol and I talk to him about ovulation and periods and what not but the first month or 2 we started ttc he told me I had to stop telling him "we have to have sex right now!" it out to much pressure on him and made him feel like I was just using him to get his sperm were very opened about everything with each other but I'm more focused on the baby making them he is he's okay with the just let it happen motto. That being said we've been ttc for 7 or 8 month and he's even brought up maybe his swimmers don't work good and I'm the next month or 2 has going to get a sperm analysis done to find out because he really does want a baby as much as I do.

TMI for husbands?

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