Inadequate

Some days, like today, when things slow down around me, I stop and think about where I am in life. Most of the time I'm overly happy, I love my husband, I love my huge family, I love my job, and most things are great. But some times, I just breakdown and cry. I cry at the inadequacy I feel for not being able to sustain a life inside of me. I feel inadequate for not being able to conceive despite supplements, tracking, and trying. I cry as I wonder where things went wrong, and why it seems all these people around me make it seem so easy. I continue to pray my time will come, hopefully sooner rather than later. I continue to smile and pretend it doesn't hurt when people ask why we haven't had a child yet. I continue to ignore the it's about time y'all start trying comments. I continue to carry on, as this has by far been the hardest, loneliest road I've ever walked.