How do you talk to a 4 year old about death?

Question

My daughters Nana passed away today. She knows she was very sick but not the extent. We were at the hospital lastnight until about 12 am& she got to see her and kiss her hand and she told her she loved her. She has literally not stopped talking about her & asking when she will be out of the hospital & when will she get better 😢 I’m so lost on how to talk to her about death. I know she’s going to be heart broken, I guess what I’m trying to ask is what is the best way to tell your 4 year old that she’s never going to see her nana again 😢 my heart is crushed for her.

Answer

Be upfront and honest. I lost my mom two days before Christmas when my oldest was 4. We waited to tell her until after Christmas because we didn’t want to ruin Christmas for her. I just told her she was very sick and she died. She’s gone forever but will never be forgotten. I don’t sugar coat anything with my kids as difficult as this subject is. She asked some questions and I answered them truthfully. She was upset but kids are pretty resilient and stronger and more understanding than one would think. I’m sorry you’re going through this, hon.

Answer

Be honest. Tell her Nana’s body stopped working and she’s (if you’re religious) with Jesus now. If you’re not religious, keep with the honesty and just explain to her that sometimes people get really sick and they don’t get better. Remind her that Nana will always love her and be with her in her heart, and maybe give her a picture to keep with her when she gets sad? Kids understand and can handle more than we give them credit for sometimes. Death is part of life. ❤️ sorry for your loss. 😞

Answer

So sorry for your loss ❤️
My girl is only 9 months old but I think a lot about those difficult conversations.
I agree with the other people who posted and just being straightforward and honest about it is the way to go.
You know your child best so you know what words to use that she’ll understand.
I feel like another helper of sorts might be a Disney movie like Moana might help. Really any Disney movie that deals with a family member death (which is all of them) because it shows the sadness but also emphasizes how the people we love never truly leave us as long as we keep them in our hearts. 
Good luck mama ❤️

Answer

Be honest. I wouldn’t sugar coat it with fancy words. Tell her nana has gone to heaven and is watching over her. That her body is no longer here on earth, etc. (depending on your beliefs) 
I know there are books out there to help but I don’t recall the titles. Google?

Answer

Just tell her that Nana has died. Explain to her that Nana went to a better place and she won’t be coming back from her permanent vacation. 
It’s hard to explain death to smaller children because they don’t quite understand until they get older.

How do you talk to a 4 year old about death?

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