Hey ladies,

So I'm apparently 9+1 according to glow. Due 8th Aug.

I went to see my midwife for first time Thursday 2nd Jan, and she didn't seem very clued up on my preg record but still she was lovely so I talked her through how to fill out my info. Anyway, she called to book me in for dating scan (12wk), and gave me 26th Jan. I'm relieved its later.

I've had 2 miscarriages in 2019, one in March at 12+5 (missed, noticed at 12wk scan) and one in July at 6wks est. (Natural bleed at home). I was in a very stressful job, working nights so home at 8am and up at 1pm for hubby to go to work and I could watch our 2 girls.

I asked her if there was anything more I could do to verify everything was okay (knowing there isn't a thing on this world that will convince me that baby will be okay). So she kindly called EPAU; where I've spent a lot of time in 2019, and booked an early scan for Friday 10th Jan as well.

I'm apprehensive having a scan at all, I don't know how I'm going to be...and will an early scan or any scan reassure me?

Has anybody been through this, did you let your pregnancy pass knowing you should enjoy it but unable to?

What did you do?

I don't know when it's going to be real and when I'll be okay to buy things.