im tired im tired im tired IM TIRED!!!!!!!

IM SO TIRED OF WAITING AND HOPING AND BEING OPTIMISTIC AND "THERES ALWAYS NEXT MONTH" NOT THERE ISNT!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I WANT TO SCREAM I WANT TO RUN MY THROAT RAW AND TRAGGED UNTIL I CANT SPEAK FOR A WEEK EVERY SECOND OF EVERY DAY IM SUPRESSING DEEP DARK SCREECHING WAILS AND IM TIRED

im so fucking tired of holding it in why isnt there some place i can go and just scream. im so tired. please god im so fucking tired.