Over the past 3 years my husband and I have known we can’t have children. We’re dealing with MFI, or Azoospermia. I found a wonderful man, who treats me so well. The only thing he’s ever wanted besides a wife, is a family.

Yesterday was our 4 year anniversary. We’ve both finally have come to terms with the fact of we will not have children naturally.

There’s other ways to have children, I get it. My husband gets it. Honestly we’re miles away from making a decision on how have them but it feels hopeless. Like truly hopeless. I don’t see God guiding us to a decision. I swear I have felt and heard God speak to me but my husband has never had any experience like that.

Today, I have wished a million times, I could just ask God, why not us? Why can’t we have one naturally? Why have you chosen this path for us?

I used to be the one in the relationship, who said, maybe God wants us to foster, maybe he wants us to adopt a future foster child, maybe there will be a child we’ll encounter who will need a family... but we’re in the fog of infertility. I don’t see us coming out of the forest with anything. 😞

I just want to know, Why not us?