Ok, so I’m a young mom.. I don’t know if anyone has to do w/how I feel now as a mom. But let me just tell you I went above and beyond for my son the first two months of his life till EVERYONE told me I wasn’t doing anything right to taking my son out of my hands saying “you sleep to much” (his dad was watching him while I sleep he’s very helpful) don’t leave him crying *for even a second* for anything I did I did wrong I got told daily I’m a bad mom by my OWN MOM! I swear to you guys I was so happy in mom life in the very beginning but everyone said something and now I don’t enjoy anything w/him. Now I’m to the point I’m fed up! I got accused yelled at basically for my son having BRUISES ON HIM! By my OWN MOM & that she’s going to call CPS on me like I did her when I was young(she did hit me it wasn’t out of hate) .. she constantly takes my son says to him “your mom don’t love you” “that’s not your mom” “mommy don’t care about you” when I cried to her holding My SON to give him back that he’s my son and not hers begging her she said no I don’t care if he’s yours.. everytime she grabs him she holds on to him like she doesn’t want me holding him.. I feel like when I had him those two months of everyone telling me I was doing wrong by my son just put me in a huge depression(I feel like) I didn’t enjoy those two months of my son because of them all I did was sleep and get yelled at for it but when I don’t sleep I get yelled at for anything I do! I don’t get it y’all want me to do this then this .. I don’t get it I’ve missed 10-9 months of my son growing up cause I just didn’t like doing anything w/him cause everything I did or didn’t do wasn’t up to yalls standards.. my son eats healthy he’s the healthiest little boy ever I know hes so loved I spoil him still yes I just don’t do anything physically w/him cause I feel so freaking judged and now to be accused of putting BRUISES ON MY SONS BACK when I know there just his Mongolian marks/spots on his back.. that fucking hurt not in the moment when I was told but when my mom made the remark of ima call cps on you! Like I said GO AHEAD! Take him to a doctor they’re going to say those are mongolian spots! Why would she think that! I feel like a shit ass mom wtf am I doing wrong..

All I can say is I wish I can raise my son how I want to and not how others want me to.. cause I swear I miss the mom I was then always having my baby by my side I’m so fucking sad when I see videos of my baby when all I did was sleep.. I wish I got to enjoy those moments not being told anything like it’s no fat what do they do that’s so right that I don’t I never neglected my baby ever I just feel so disconnected now from him and all I have to say is I feel like that’s my so called family’s fault..

I just had to get this off my chest while crying cause I’m so confused on why they just don’t support me in everything and just bring me down on raising my first son