I’m paranoid that my little boy has autism 😭

Before I post anything I just wanted to mention that we live in England and DO NOT have a paediatrician (I know there will be lots of you telling me to go see them, but I can’t!).

My son is 6 months and one week old (or 27 and a half weeks) and I’m concerned that he’s autistic.

He’s not babbling. He does make some sounds (ah-gee etc.) but not many and he won’t have a ‘conversation’. I’ve tried sooo many times but he never responds to me and usually is looking around at something else. If he’s ‘talking’ I’ll respond but then he just stops altogether.

If I call his name he might turn but most of the time he just doesn’t and is too involved in whatever he’s focused on. I also feel like he’s not turning to him name but just ‘a noise’. Like, I could have clapped or said anything and he’d of looked.

He does smile and laugh lots but if I smile at him after a blank expression he doesn’t really smile back. He might do the tiniest smirk but that doesn’t happen often either.

If I blow raspberries or try and do anything for him to copy, he just doesn’t.

His eye contract is good - he’ll look at me when I finally get his attention but then he soon gets distracted again.

I really don’t know what I’m expecting anyone to say but I’m praying with every fibre of my being that he doesn’t have autism. I’ll obviously love my son in any case but as a teacher I know autism can be a real challenge for parents, the child and their peers. I just want him to be ‘normal’. I feel so awful saying that because I love him so much and will, but I’m so scared.

It’s so hard. I know I need to give him time but I also don’t want to ignore the early signs.

If you’re also from England, do you recommend me contacting my health visitor now with my worries? Or should I give him time and bring it up at the 12 month review, if I’m still concerned then?

If you got this far, thanks for reading!