3 Upvotes
Comment
Apparently I’m the unpopular opinion compared to the other comments but I think that if you and your boyfriend believe you’re ready and are financially secure then why not? Everyone wants different things in life. Some people think at 20, 21, 22 that you’re making a huge mistake because you won’t be able to “go out and party” anymore or something like that. But... that’s not a priority for many people. My fiancé and I are 22 and 27 and we are expecting our first in 6 months 🥰 it won’t be easy but it will NEVER be easy. Do what you feel is right/you’re ready for!
Angry Mom
To start off I’m 20, almost 21 years old. My boyfriend and I have been together 5 years. We are both financially stable with decent jobs and just bought our own home. My mother and I share an Amazon Prime account (2 day shipping is beautiful, am I right?) I was looking at opk’s, Preseed, etc. on Amazon. My mother actually called me to ask me about it because she was on the account and saw the search history. She told me it was an absolutely stupid idea to be trying for a baby, that I’m too young and will ruin my life forever.
I can’t lie, that hurt really bad and I’m pretty upset with her. I was honestly shocked because I didn’t think she would have such a foul reaction considering I am in a good, long term relationship and we are both stable. Is it wrong of me to be upset and shocked? Do you think my mother is right? Has anything like this ever happened to you?
Vote below to see results!
567
views • 3
upvotes • 15
comments
COMMENT (15)
I can see both sides. My husband and I have been together since I was 14. At 21 I believed I was ready to have a baby and if he would have been open to it I would have popped one out then and there. We had stable jobs, a nice place to live, and would have made it work. That being said, waiting was the best decision we ever made. There is a huge difference in what is “financially secure” at 21 vs 27. We had the space to go through the hardships we needed to go through, our communication is insanely different (in the best way), and we are established in our careers and have a strong financial base with zero debt. At the end of the day though you know what’s best for you and your partner. Just be sure you are 100% sure of your decision before you take the leap!
I had my first baby 9 days before my 21st bday..i think Moms are suppose to say things like that..we will probably do the same when our daughters start talking about kids..but ur an adult..a responsible adult n u can make ur own decisions..my mom hated that i was pregnant but once my baby came it was over..she couldnt put her down..she said the same when i got pregnant recently n had my second in june..n she absolutely loves her too..im pregnant again n she just stopped putting her two cents in..she knows she is gonna love all her grankids no matter if we r too young or too old...u know what u want..the only person that matters besides u is who u choose to be the baby's father
She might have reason for reacting that way. Not that you were a mistake but how different would your mother’s life be if she didn’t have you? Think about what you could do before having a child and not being able to do things you could’ve, should’ve and would’ve done. She isn’t saying not to have children but she wants you to live your life before committing your life to a child. Kids are a huge responsibility and take a lot of your time and money. Live a little...
If you’re ready, go for it! I was married at 22 and wish we had started sooner because I found out at 27 that I had endometriosis and it took us 3 years of not preventing and 2 years of trying to conceive our first and now at 30 we can’t get pregnant with #2 and have been off BC since Nov 2018. It all depends on where you’re at in life!
My mum was the same! I was 25 and married, had been with my husband for 7 years, financially stable and owned 3 houses! Geez thanks mum, did I ruin your life? Is that why you’re bitter... SMH. Do what you want to do. I have 2 kids and I’m 30 now. I do miss the freedom of my youth but I wouldn’t trade my kids for all the parties in the world ;-)
I don’t think age is an issue but I think marriage is. I think you should be married before trying to conceive.
Br
Unpopular opinion..but I agree with you. I never would have TTC without being married. EVEN though my (now husband) and I were together 7yr before marriage. I still wouldn’t tried. Why? Because a wedding after a baby seems like it “had to happen” and sometimes people aren’t ready like they think they are, but unwed dads are more likely to leave since they have no commitment legally.
I see both sides. I say that because some women think they are ready one day, and then aren’t when it happens. Maybe take it day by day, try “naturally” and if it happens it happens. No need to rush to the opks right away. As for your mom, I see where she’s coming from BECAUSE most of us whom are 20-30 have “old fashioned” parents who want to see a commitment and a wedding before a baby. Society today skips that “step” in life and has many babies with many dads and never settles down, where as for your parents generation it was frowned upon to have kids unwed.
Let's Glow!
Achieve your health goals from period to parenting.
