Cant wait for my bfp

Okay ladies

Since my 3rd miscarriage in December I cant stop praying an obsession over getting pregnant an staying pregnant I'm dreaming of being pregnant an looking on all pregnancy apps an forums. My hubby was heartbroken with this last miscarriage an he said he wanted to wait one minute then asked when I'm ovulating so we can start trying again (crying with me telling me it's not my fault)but I'm scared of miscarrying an having to tell him I miscarried again I'm having conflicted feelings(scared, scared to get excited )I want this so bad but I'm so scared