Is it over for us ??

I'm with my partner and father to my 3 kids 13 years.. we are like best friends. Most of the time but the last few months have been really challenging .. I have found myself resenting him for not helping out more with the kids , house ect and all we are doing is fighting and bickering , he will blame me for anything that goes wrong and it absolutely drives me insane..... I have borderline personality disorder and I am in therapy for this, but it makes me have explosive anger and serious suicidal thoughts whenever we have a bad fight ... I'm not sure if it is my moods and depression making him so fucking pissy towards me but I don't know how I feel about him anymore 😔 do I even love him anymore .. I am emotionally numb at the moment so I don't feel anything anymore.. I'm not sure what the point of this post is really I just needed to write it all down I guess.