Does my body just hate me?

I swear I have the Murphy's law of IVF journeys. I know I am not alone in this group, so I just have to share some frustrations with people who can understand. Why can't I get pregnant? Because literally none of my reproductive organs seem to work right!

I started going to the RE in July of 2018. When I went to have my HSG test, we quickly discovered that I had scar tissue over my cervix (from LEEP procedure after irregular pap) and they could not insert the catheter. My RE thought it could be the reason why I was having trouble so I had surgery to fix it.

Next issue, my HSG both tubes blocked. I thought ok this is definitely the reason. Surgery again, one tube removed, other tube could not be fixed and we went on to IVF.

On our first cycle we got one embroyo, had FET but ended in miscarriage. Ended up in the ER. As I was bleeding all over, the ER doctor told me my blood test shows that I am still pregnant. I lost so much blood they almost had to give me a blood transfusion. Emergency D&C was a lifesaver.

Second round, my eggs were just so crappy. Out of the 12 retrieved only one would fertilize. . "Just really low quality eggs" my RE explained, "we're not going to get much more than one embroyo a cycle."By some miracle the one fertilized egg made it to a 5 day blast. My RE says my eggs will only get worse as I get older so we decided to give a round 3 a shot before transfer.

Round 3, 7 eggs retrieved none fertilized. RE says she has tried every protocol and she doesnt recommend we do any more egg retrievals unless we want to look into having an egg donor or trying some "wierd experimental" protocols.

We still have our last shot blast, so we put a pause on everything during the holidays (because let's face it, the holidays are stressful enough) and picked up this month. Cycle started, I started meds and we planned for an FET around Feb 10th. January marked 6 months since my last Sono check, so I had to have another.

Today I went in for the Sono and discovered I have a fibroid in my uterus. FET is canceled and now I have to have surgery next week. I am so relieved we caught this because I really want this transfer to be successful, I am just so sick of feeling like my body is betraying me and it seems like there is an issue at every stage of this journey for me.

We left the doctor's office disappointed and when we walked out I said to my husband "Someday we will walk out of this office with good news." And I do believe it is possible, but still feeling a little low tonight.