I have social anxiety and depression I’ve been dealing with it for years and I’m just ready to get treatment. My birthday was last month I had a dinner with my family and didn’t say one word, I just stay in my room all day and I feel like I’m not living my life. I’m incapable of making small talk, and just get awkward and I 100% avoid human interaction. I do online school, shop online, and only get groceries at night. If I see a lot of people I will take a long route around the store to avoid them physically seeing me. I’m tired of living like this but I can’t help it.

I want to get help but I’m scared, I’m embarrassed. I don’t know how to pursue therapy I’m even nervous just thinking about how a session like what do I even tell my therapist 😫. Do I just hop into my problems, will they slowly guide me ??? I overthink the whole situation till I just don’t wanna go anymore but this year I want to believe that I can get help. My boyfriend (been together since we were 16 I’m 20 now) pushes me to get help, he understands me but we have an issue because his family kind of doesn’t. They want me involved and he wants me around too for their events but I’m scared. I get so much anxiety and I just don’t want them not liking me (he said they told him they understand and that they love me because he told them I was shy) I won’t even talk to them on the phone which makes me sad because I don’t want them to think I don’t like them but I also don’t want to talk to them idk what to say I don’t know small talk. I don’t know how to be around others I’ve been so isolated. Sorry this is so long but I just want encouragement to tell me that I can go to therapy and not to doubt myself.