It’s 3am and I know my body isn’t going to let me sleep.

My younger brother has mental health issues (autism and adhd) he’s 21 now but mentally he is much younger, probably on par with a 12/13 year old.

We’ve had issues in the past whereby he was speaking to girls much younger than him (12-16), the girls in question have told him they’re older and foolishly he’s believed them and gone on to have certain conversations/exchanges of photos etc. This was quickly picked up and dealt with by the police, he was placed on a register and ever since my mum has gone out of her way ten-fold taking him to various counselling/psychiatric appointments to try and support him and help him understand the differences between what’s appropriate and inappropriate and action = consequences because his level of understanding is pretty poor. His access to internet was cut last summer so he doesn’t have a phone or social media etc.

We thought this was going well (as well as it could anyway), until yesterday when he was arrested for approaching younger girls in our area in person, talking to them, following them and generally just making them feel uncomfortable.

Because of the history however its being dealt with seriously (rightly so - we do not in any way condone his behaviour) and it’s looking unlikely that he will be released home any time soon. But knowing his mental state, we know prison is not going to come even close to being a safe place for him. But the police have deemed him fit for normal procedures (trial etc should it come to that). Ive supported so far by sitting in on his interviews as an appropriate adult and he genuinely does not see the severity of the situation he is in, he just believes he is trying to be friendly. Even his solicitor commented that he doesn’t know what planet he’s on.

My poor mums going out of her mind with worry, added to the fact some of these girls were local so everyone around where she lives will know and obviously this kind of behaviour attracts a very strong label and other people aren’t going to understand his background - naturally they will think he’s a predator. She’s doesn’t want him home if they do bail him but equally a hostel will be no better for him that prison so she’s fretting.

I’m sad because I supported my mum a lot growing up (she was on her own with us), my sister was a handful so I would help a lot with my brother, getting him ready for school, helping him into bed etc so in my minds eye I just keep thinking back to this innocent little child that never understood and it’s heartbreaking to sit there in an interview room knowing he’s on a dangerous path in life which interventions so far haven’t helped with.

In addition to all this going on, a close relative has terminal cancer and I think we’re near the end and my young baby (3 months) has health issues that may require surgery so for me personally I am stressed beyond belief. My other half is somewhat supportive but he doesn’t have much understanding when it comes to mental health, his world and his views are very black and white in the fact that he thinks my brother should be locked up and left there and that it’s as simple as that.

I have no idea what I can do to make any of this situation better. I’m so so so worried for my brothers safety but equally if he is unable to behave appropriately he is better off behind closed doors for others safety also. I feel terrible for these girls that are now on edge and nervous to leave their homes because of him.

If you made it this far - thank you. I don’t know what this post is to achieve other than giving me a chance to get it off my chest in an anonymous space in hopes someone else might have found themselves in similar circumstances and can share their experiences.