I Need Help — Boyfriend Drinks A Lot

I really need somebody to talk to. I do not know what to do anymore and I feel as though I have reached the point to where I am now lost and need advice. So, I am reaching out.....

My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years. He is 27 and I am 33. We get along and are compatible with each other. He stays true to his responsibilities in the household and helps pay the bills. Most importantly, we love each other very much.

For quite sometime he has been drinking 3-5 beers A NIGHT. It was a daily thing, and I did not like seeing that. I did not like seeing it because he would wake up every morning with a headache and as I am concerned with my health, I love him and tend to be concerned of his health. Also, alcoholism runs in his family so he is prone to addiction and alcoholism and I do not want to enable it any further. We want to eventually have kids and start a family and I for sure do not want them around it.

When we were together for 1 year, I noticed his addiction for weed and alcohol. I mentioned my concerns about it and as I was naive going through young love at the time, I accepted it because it did not affect our love for each other.

I would mention it every year, be upset for a moment, and then let it go again because I once again felt it was not affecting our love or effort for each other.

WELL....we started buying moscato to enjoy in the evenings during special occasions (I know, moscato has very small amounts of alcohol in it), but one night he finished a whole bottle in addition to his 3-5 beers. I did not like that. I got angry with him and asked him to space it out or to slow down on the beer. We have been arguing through out this week and it is only putting an emotional wedge between us. There has been a lot of tension and negative energy in our surroundings. I want to find a way to have peace again where we can agree on a realistic compromise and stick to it.

He went 4 days without 1 beer which was major improvement! Then, we decided on 1 beer every other day...but he immediately changed it to doing 1 beer a day. He is being very wishy-washy about the compromise. Then he decided he would drink during the weekends, then changed it to wanting to do 2 beers a night instead. I don’t know, but I see the number of beers increasing again. What do I do now? I have never really made such a big deal over beer until now...because 3-5 a night just seems excessive and I feel he should cut down or take a break before he loses control over it.

If my boyfriend drinks as much as he does but it does not affect us, should I just let it go? I know he drinks a lot but I don’t want to see him suffer with his health in the future. I also do not want to see him be an alcoholic. I honestly don’t know what to do....and I feel that I may be blinded with love, lol. I need help, please, anybody, help me figure out how to put my mind back on track...thank you!!!!

UPDATE: Okay, I think compromising with 2 beers a night to slowly cut down may be a fair and realistic goal to start with.