was just made even harder by my brother-in-law telling my husband and I that him and his girlfriend of two years are pregnant.

So I rushed to the cupboard, grabbed a test that I got for free from instagram and used it with my 2ish hour hold pee. And of course is negative.

I know it’s early, and it was a cheap/crappy test that I’ve never used before but I wanted it SO BAD to be positive so I could feel hopeful.

We haven’t told our families what we have been going through as we wanted it to be a surprise, but I can’t help but feel so defeated right now😭

End rant.