Am I over reacting?

Question

My husband and I have been together for about 3-1/2 years. At the beginning of our relationship we had sex all the time, it was funk and kinky and everything I loved, but about a year in it just stopped: we have sex mayyybe once a week if I’m lucky, sometimes only once or twice a month and it’s almost always the same, me on top, he comes in under 5 minutes and I’m left unsatisfied. I’ve asked him about it and he’s says he’s just tired and he’s not a very horny person, I’ve told him how hard it is for me and he says I’m guilt tripping him and then he sulks around and it’s super annoying. I’ve tried everything it seems, I do my make-up, curl my hair, make sure I keep up the house and our daughter so he can be relaxed and it never works. He takes absolutely no interest in me naked or in a cute outfit and it makes me feel like I’m not good enough. I love my husband but it kills me to think this might be my sex life for the rest of my life. Tonight I tried bringing up couples sex toys and showed him some things I’d like to try and he just shut me down and said no he doesn’t like that type of thing. Obviously sex isn’t the most important thing in a relationship but I’m really craving some romance and intimacy and I don’t know what to do anymore.

Answer

I feel like you’re doing everything and he just seems like he’s not interested at all. I’m going to give you my honest opinion and speaking from experience he most likely has someone on the side. Maybe I’m wrong hopefully I am. But the way he is acting points to that direction

Answer

In response to Mel’s comment, it is not right for anyone to make such harsh assumptions. Don’t let this app plant that seed of doubt in your mind. In response to your post, I think it is important to remember, you vowed to love him through sickness and in health. We do not get married because we want great sex every night, you get married because this is the person who you love more than yourself and want to grow old with. Try putting yourself in his shoes would you want him to be mad if you weren’t ever in the mood?

Answer

Maybe he has testosterone issues. It happens and causes low libido.

Answer

My man and i had the same thing going on.we have been together for almost 7 years. And after a couple we just stoped having sex all the time. Maybe once a month if i was lucky. I would ask him all the time. And be turned down. It hurt like hell. Made me feel so bad. I would talk to him and end up crying. But we went to the doctor and it was a mix of depression and low testosterone. So after talking more and some meds things have been so much better!!!! We have sex 2-3 times a week!

Answer

Maybe ask what changed? After leaving him alone about it for awhile, seems pressured. Maybe let it go for a couple weeks and honor yourself  ✨

Answer

My fiancé and I been together almost 2 and a half years and in the beginning it was great, we would have sex 2-3 times a day! Everyday! Lol but then about a year and a half later we stopped having sex so much, probably do it 2-3 times a month now. And we’re fine with it. None of us have “someone on the side”, were not cheating. We’re both completely happy and satisfied in our relationship. I think we just fucked so much till we couldn’t fuck anymore 💀💀💀 anyways idk your husband but don’t assume that there’s someone else, peoples sex drive just isn’t the same after a while 🤷🏻‍♀️

Answer

My ex was the same it was so hard sometimes cause he didn't want sex and was so tired all the time and seemed so low turns out he had depression maybe try talking to gim and just saying how you feel and see if there is something wrong and there's a reason he's so tired

Answer

Does he have depression? My hubby won't have a sex drive at all if he's feeling blue

Answer

My husband is the same... we have sex every 4-6 months. I complained, but i think it is hormonal issue. He stays home and work from home. He doesn have a side chick. I even suspected he maybe gay, coz he brought guy friends every 1-2 months for strategy board game and wine or beer...
I think he is finding it difficult to get the moods... i m a musician that performs on stage, so i take care of my appearance. But that does not change the fact that he does not have the mood.
I talked abt it, but he always gets irritated. I dont wanna push too much, that it destroys his confidence in himself as a husband, as a man. But i completely understand how you feel.
I assure u that it is not always abt cheating, but it could be abt mental and hormonal. My husband refuse to visit the docter, so i respect his choice. I just wait and see if he makes an effort. Coz like you, i have always done my part in taking care of the house and our child.

Answer

I suggest checking out r/deadbedrooms on Reddit. A lot of the people on there have really great advice. I’m sorry you’re feeling like this though, I hope things get better.

Am I over reacting?

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