I feel I’m a bad mom!

I am having such a difficult time with two of my kiddos. I have four kids two boys and two girls. My girls are the oldest of the four. My second girl who is six I have struggled to connect with since she was born. She demanded more attention than her sister who was quiet and calm. She is very high energy can’t sit still and seems to be in trouble constantly despite daily repetitive talks and boundaries.

My two year son who was born not breathing or crying and spent a week in the NICU is pretty much the same as his six year old sister. He screams constantly randomly. The only time he don’t is when he gets what he wants. He is a tall growing boy who is heavy (not in weight) but in body size. I have chronic pain and when he tantrums and fights he can sometimes hurt me.

I’m frustrated that I feel disconnected with two of my children. I do parenting class parent groups social online moms groups and close family and friends. I don’t know how to over come this feeling.

PLEASE before you think to judge I love each of my kids with all my heart and breath. I was told I couldn’t have kids and the Lord blessed me beyond come.

Is there other moms out there that have been through this kind of feelings? If so how have you over comed it and was it a long time to come to terms with.