My husband and I had been wishing for weeks that this would be our daughters birthday. We so wanted an April baby as we had felt she may come early. We wanted her to make it to 39wks so her lungs would be nice and strong when being born into this COVID19 lock down world.

We also didn’t want her to be weeks late as our Los Angeles hospital was starting to have crazy restrictions and had begun filling up with virus cases.

Despite not being able to have our incredible doula with us in our room, or our families in the waiting room- as we expected- we had such a positive birth experience.

On April 1st I went in to visit my amazing OB for a membrane sweep. He was on call the following day (April 2nd) at the hospital and we both were hoping the sweep would send me into labor the following day so he could be present.

Well. It worked. As soon as I got home on April 1st I started feeling signs of early labor.

My husband and I went for what we knew would be our last neighborhood pregnancy stroll. He took photos of me as I contracted with a smile on my face.

By the time we were heading to bed that night I was having time-able contractions. They excited both of us because we knew we may be meeting our girl soon.

We messaged our doula that we may be calling her in the middle of the night to have her labor at home with me before we headed into the hospital. She told me to try to get as much rest as possible.

I woke up at 1:30am with a contractions that jolted me from bed. My husband ran a bath for me and I told him I’d try to sleep more but that I knew our baby was coming soon.

I’ll never forget the look on his face. He was so happy and had such love for me in his eyes.

At 3am I was up again- but I was fearful it was still early and wanted both my doula and husband to rest- so I quietly labored alone in my tub for an hour.

I meditated on being a mother soon. My contractions were now only 3mins apart and very strong. By the time my bath was finished at 4am, I knew I’d needed to wake my husband and doula.

My husband called our doula and as she made her way to us, he bounced around packing the car, making broth, hospital snacks and helping me through my contractions.

By the time my doula made it to our house, I was deeply moaning through contractions and expressed that I feared I had waited too long. I dreaded the hospital COVID19 screenings to enter and the bright lights of triage while having such intense contractions.

She was so calming and reassuring but did urge us to go in. We only got 45 mins with her at home before we were heading to the hospital.

It was not 6am and upon our arrival at the hospital, our fevers were taken at the door with a group of nurses in hazmat suits before I was wheeled up to labor and delivery.

Being a FTM- I had planned to listening to my body on whether I wanted an epidural or not. With the stress of the virus and not having my doula- I knew at this point I’d have a more relaxing experience with some help and requested the epidural.

In triage I was already 5cm dilated and my contractions were only 2 mins apart. There was a bit of poking and prodding before they brought me to my Labor and Delivery Room.

Soon after, a badass female anesthesiologist administered my epidural. It was complete in less than 30 seconds and was completely painless. It immediately felt heavenly. It was a “dial” epidural. Meaning for my entire labor I could control the amount. I could move my legs and felt every contraction- but I could also nap and laugh with my husband and nurses.

Then- They tested me for COVID19. It was so strange- uncomfortable but painless. I was relieved that they allowed my husband to stay with me and we were not required to wear masks.

My favorite OB was on call and he was such a calming presence. I spent the day blissful and excited to be a mommy. My husband snuck me snacks and kept our family posted. I was so relaxed and comfortable and actually enjoyed feeling the growing contractions

When 10:30pm rolled around- I knew it was time to push. The drs came and prepped me, excitedly exclaiming that it was my babies birthday!

They then left me alone to labor with a nurse whose energy I didn’t love. She was yelling as motivation to push and tried turning lights on- both going against my birth plan.

I told my husband to FaceTime my doula- and right in-front of the nurse I told her- I’m not happy with this nurses energy and I do not want to push with her. My doula encouraged me to call the dr back in and advocate for what I wanted. I didn’t care about hurting anyone’s feelings. THIS WAS MY LABOR.

So the dr came back in, calmed the room and turned the lights off and stayed with me.

I pushed for an hour and thirty minutes. Zero pain. Actually I LOVED pushing and time flew by. The energy in the room was so magical. I’ve never worked so hard for something.

My husband was amazing and massaged my neck and placed cool lavender scented towels on my head. He was so excited and filled with love for me.

Before I knew it my beautiful little baby girl was placed on my chest. And all the most amazing fireworks of love that they tell you about happened. My husband and I both burst into tears and it was BEYOND the best moment of my life.

I easily birthed my placenta and was given one small stitch.

Despite the following 24hrs in recovery before discharge being filled with anxiety- because of the virus and being in the hospital and having her being exposed to so many people- we felt lucky to be sent home sooner than so many others.

My physical and emotional recovery has been so much better than I imaged. Besides three days of PPA and zero sleep from hormones and adrenaline (which I felt was totally normal)- I feel amazing. I had one small stitch that dissolved in days, very light bleeding that now (12 days later) is almost gone. I’m flying high with love for my baby and starting to feel connected to my body again.

She’s sleeping and breastfeeding like a champ.

My FTM take away is- we get a lot of horror stories about labor and the fear they give us is pointless. We will all have our own story and perspective is EVERYTHING.

Positive birth is invaluable. Let fear go, Advocate for yourselves and realize that whatever happens- YOU ARE AMAZING.

🤍

Meet Our Angel.

Storie Louise Showalter

Born 4/2/2020

8lbs 4oz

39 weeks and 2 days

Our Aries Pandemic Fire Baby.