Hi I have a 16 turning 17 *in a week* year old daughter. She doesn't really break the rules, does not backtalk me or other adults, makes good grades, etc. She was at work earlier today (Because people wont stop going to fast food restaurants 🙄) and left her phone sitting on the coffee table. Her phone lights up when she gets notifications. She got a message from her boyfriend and it was the "🍆" emoji. So I went through their messages. There were no nude photos thankfully because I taught her that sending nudes underage is child porn. But there was a LOT of dirty messages that I don't even wanna retype, plus some voice mail. So when she got home I asked her if she was sexually active. She got uncomfortable and stayed quiet. I asked her again and she said yes. I asked her were you sneaking him in and she said no they were in his car. I asked her if she knows thats illegal and she said yes but that they took the risk. So I thanked her for the honesty because I'm trying to teach my kids that honesty is appreciated even if the person you're talking to doesn't like what they hear. I currently have her phone and her laptop. I can't really ground her since we're basically all grounded 😂. She asked for her phone back and I said no. I explained to her that I'm punishing her because I'm trying to protect her. Having sex when you're a child can mess you up and I explained that sex is for adults & why it's for adults. She asked if she could at least send her boyfriend a goodnight message because thats something they do every night and I said yes. Anyways, she is asleep now. I am debating whether or not I should give her the phone back because I truly did appreciate her honesty from earlier. It meant the world to me.. But I really can't condone their actions. Then again, I can't say I was an innocent kid. (The goal is to make sure our kids are better than us though lol)