My husband, son, and I live in my husband's hometown. One of my very few friends is my husband's cousin. She has a 6yo and my son is 11mo.

Her son is SUPER clingy, to the point where it feels off sometimes. When I was breastfeeding my son he was curious, which I get, but he would always come sit right next to me while I fed my baby and watch intently. I am not good with confrontation so I'd try to go to another room and he'd usually tell his mom he was going to help me and try to follow.

More recently when we have had them over to our house, and I'm playing with my son calmly trying to read to him or teach him how to color or throw a ball, the 6yo will interject himself into whatever we are doing (which im fine with if he would participate properly) and try to talk over me or exclude my son from the game. At one point I was rolling a ball to my son and he was throwing it back. The 6yo came in, took the ball from my son and said "how about we play pass, ill toss it to you and you toss it back to me." Then when I told him we have to include my son too he sighed and played for 5 minutes then left.

I do gently redirect when he does things trying to exclude my son but I have no idea how to tell him he's invading my personal space without embarrassing or stepping on his moms toes. And when she hears me redirecting him she just yells at him that if he can't behave they'll go home.

He also trashes my sons playroom every time they come over and does not clean it up, and when she tells him to (about half the time) he throws a fit until they go home with no toys cleaned up.

I want to stay friends I'm just getting exhausted with him making me feel uncomfortable, and with him acting like I'm his parent and I'm replacing him with the baby. We weren't close friends until about a year ago when I was pregnant, so its not like I've been a staple in his life growing up.

DISCLAIMER we haven't seen them since we've been quarantined, just trying to sort my life out while I've got space.