Coparenting (long but need input please)

I just need some input. My sons father hasn’t really been around unless it’s convenient for him and I haven’t asked him for much except for diapers and wipes a time or two. I stopped doing all the work for him and I’m having him ask me to see our son instead of me putting forth the effort. Pretty much I stopped doing what he should have been doing.

Anyways.

Is it wrong of me to finally put my foot down and say that he can see our son once he’s starts helping financially? I told him he can start having him once he got him his own car seat, his own clothes, diapers, wipes, etc because he needs them at his house and as a parent that is his responsibility.

Now he is saying that I am refusing to give our son to him and he’s going to take me to court because I filed for child support. He says he has all the messages from me stating he can’t have our son when in reality I was just saying he can have him once he gets the things he needs and starts contributing to our sons necessities...

Nothing has changed other than me asking for child support because I was tired of asking for help and him having an excuse and me having to figure it out in my own. But because I did something like child support “behind is back” it was disrespectful and I just needed to ask and he deserves visitation with his son. Even tho I have never withheld our son even before...

He’s trying to make me out to be this terrible mother who is against fathers and kids spending time together but that’s not true at all. I’ve felt I’ve pushed the relationship but now since I’m not all hell has broke loose. Anyways I’m rambling, please give me your honest input. I do appreciate it.