I’m writing this as I spend a lot of time in my head.. Which then leads to hours googling symptoms, like some obsessed wild information junkie. I need to vent and get things off my chest! I’m shy about writing online due to my Dyslexia.

I’ve had 4 known miscarriages and several suspected dodgy periods. The kind that make you think “hmmm, was I...”. Also known as chemical pregnancies. I still class them as pregnancies nonetheless.

Anyway, I will potentially start my period either today or tomorrow and the wait is unbearable 🤬

I haven’t been actively symptom watching this month. I decided to focus my mind on other things, which has been surprisingly easy during lockdown.

Also, I normally experience period pains 10 says prior to af showing. These symptoms mimic the early signs of pregnancy which can be annoying. So this month, I decided to embrace my period, quirks and all and just live my life free from TTC worries.

Like clockwork, my breast became increasingly tender, nausea peaked, funny taste in mouth appeared and I had a severe loss of appetite. As well as severe fatigue and strange, off the chart, crazily high sex drive. I’m not a DIY kind of person, not a great fan, the last 10 days I have worn myself out. Then worn my partner out😳

On Saturday morning I woke up with mild cramps. I ran to the bathroom without my glasses. I wipes and noticed a reddish pinkish stain. I assumed I had started. I wiped again and there was nothing. Slightly confused, I decided to use a panty liner as I noticed a brownish stain on my underwear during the morning. I assumed I was having a slow start to my period. This happened on Sunday as well. Then stopped.

So guess who started symptom spotting?!

“My breast feel super tender”... Do they Su? Do they really?

“I’m super moody” nope, this is normal Su, you’re due to start, silly.

“I feel really tired” yes, because you sleep for 4-5hrs as per usual until you have a fibro flare. Then you’ll be off your feet for a week🙄

We all know what the potential answer will be. It’s either due to period or pregnancy or even menopause.

“Wait, why is there so much egg white discharge on cd27?” Now, I cant answer that at all.

I know I won’t know for sure until either AF shows or I get a bfp. And even if I get a bfp, history has shown me it’s no real guarantee.

All I can do is wait. Meditate. <a href="https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.glow.android.nurture">Nurture</a> my body correctly and try not to loose my temper when my partner eats my chocolate after eating all of his treats which he didn’t share!!!! 🤬

The two week wait is the worst!

If you have read up to this point, thank you for your time, you are too kind. I just needed to rant and I feel soooooo much better. Pissing ttw! I don’t want af to visit. As I’m a woman of a certain age, I’m kind of happy to see her. Then want her gone, so that I can continue practising🤰🤞☺️

I will only update this if I get a bfp.

Have a wonderful week and keep baby dancing!!!

*****update 28/05/2020******

As promised I came back to update this..... I’m pregnant 😳. I really didn’t see that coming at all!!!!