I know people have it worst out there but I just wanted to share my story.

While growing up my older sisters had to help my mom while my older brother was coddled by my mom. But my sisters had each other to help with their problems. Now they’re married and have kids. Which leads me by myself with my parents and 3 brothers. So I try my best to clean the kitchen, living room, bathroom everyday.

So my mom could just come home to cook and rest.

I wake up and start cleaning and cooking for my brothers since they have been coddles too much, they don’t really know how to wash a dish 🤦‍♀️. I make sure my brothers finished his homework bc I don’t want them to fail especially since one is about to enter high school. But when she comes home, she automatically starts yelling at me saying I don’t do anything around here, telling me I’m no good and why do I go to school since I speak Spanglish.

It’s not just my mom, it everyone in my household. I don’t really speak to my dad, (he actually my stepdad but raised me since I was a baby) idk why but I try my best to speak to him but we have nothing in common since I’m not boy. I always wanted a daughter and daddy relationship but ig we can’t. As I get older I get more distance from him. At time, it doesn’t even feel like he’s a dad to me, he just buys me clothes and stuff I want. But I don’t want that I want him to tell me he loves me and everything. For my birthday this year he didn’t even give me a hug, usually every year he would give me a hug and say happy birthday but this year he waited until I almost got out the car to drop me off to school just to say happy birthday and drove off. As I got older it weird for me to hug him and give him a kiss on the cheek. But maybe I’ll never have the relationship with my dad like I always wanted to. Speaking of dad, my birth dad was never in the picture because he had a wife while with my mom. He always tried to get in contact with me but I always knew he wasn’t my dad and that my dad is my stepdad. I always appreciate my dad for stepping in and being a father figure in my life, taking me in as one of his own kids but deep down I know I’m not, from my own brother to his own family and strangers telling me he’s not my dad.

Now my brothers, I have 3 brothers. My older brother is 6 year older than me, he was also like my dad growing up,helping me with stuff I couldn’t handle. He’s my favorite now because before he would hit me and yell at me saying stuff I don’t even remember now until he brings it up. He was a bully then but he grew out it. Now my younger brothers, well one is 3 years apart from me, I sometimes don’t go out without him, now I sometimes have separating anxiety. He grew to be toxic. He would yell at me, saying stuff my birth dad leaving me and that my dad isn’t my dad and he doesn’t want me and that’s why he’s the favorite one because he’s my dad first born and everything like that. Everytime he gets mad at me he tells my parents all the secrets I’ve told him. He could say the worst things so he could make me cry. So now I don’t tell him anything. He gets mad at everyone especially at my mom since I’ve noticed my mom doesn’t like my brother. They always argue and then my dad gets involved and hit my brother since he always takes my mom side. Now my little brother, well I don’t like him because my parents let him get away with everything, he could curse at my mom in English and he wouldn’t get hit. One time he spent over $400 on a video game, they hit him and took it away supposedly for 1 month but my parents gave in 1 week later. He could get away with anything and my parents wouldn’t care. However I try my best to take his game and make sure he get what he deserved since my parents don’t do it but when I do it, I end up getting hit for hitting him. Idc what anyone says my parents are very irresponsible.

Now my mom... seeing as my sisters grew up, I don’t have it worse, however they both had each other and I don’t, which makes it harder for 1 person to handle. She would just yell at me for no reason, if there was a bowl in the sink, she would yell. Anything you could think of, she would yell. My brothers don’t get involved, they don’t have my back. Every time she would yell at me she would tell me to live with a boy I was talking to, that I used liked. Saying I should live with me so he could pay everything for me. Saying he could buy me a new phone, (for Christmas and my birthday 2 years ago, I wanted a new phone, my parents said they’ll buy it if I helped around the house and get good grades, I did everything but they didn’t care and never got it) they even threatened me with it, saying if I don’t do this, they won’t buy it but when I do it, they say I won’t get it because I don’t do anything. They tell me to get a job because I don’t do anything when I do everything. I have been going to laundry with my mom since I was 9 years old early in the morning at 5 while my brother got to enjoy sleeping. She tells me to learn how to cook my future man, if I don’t, he’ll never love me. My mom would cry because she said she missed her daughters but now I know she didn’t, she missed yelling and mentally abusing them.

I don’t know what to do anymore. I’ve gotten tired of them treating me like shit. I don’t ever feel appropriated. No one says thank you. I’ve given up my social life to hang with my parents because if i don’t, I’m a bad daughter. They made me guilty for not doing anything for them. As I got older I realized that I want to get out and never come and once I get out of this house I won’t be coming back. As I got older I realized they mentally and emotionally abused me.

Everytime we argue I tell them I’m putting them in a home bc I won’t be dealing with them. I don’t want to because a dropout like my siblings, I don’t want a man to treat me like shit, if my future man and I can’t cook something then idk what to say, I’ll eventually learn. I want to become a successful social worker who is independent.

I had become more sensitive and I don’t like it. My family is not the type to be sensitive so I try not to be in front of them. I have being the weak one. Ngl that’s my biggest fear. I hate being emotional. I find it disgusting for me and weird

Out of all my siblings, I know for a fact that I will become the successful one and I will not give them thanks to any of them. Seeing how my younger brothers are turning up, rude, disgusting, toxic and much more, at the end my mom still won’t be proud of me. Growing up im the only one that has cared for my grades and school the most. My mom will always chose other siblings over me and I’m proud to say that I will never come back to this family when I’m a successful independent person, no matter what. I’m gonna make until I can’t no more. Nobody has helped me with school, I have to do everything myself, they don’t check my grades and only care if I’m in school, nothing else. My motivation of becoming successful is that I don’t want to become my siblings or my parents ever.