Diet help

I’m so disgusted in myself lately, that it’s ruining everything. I am married with 3 kids, the youngest is 10 months. I’ve been trying to diet ever since he was born, I’m about 20lbs over where I feel my best, so I’ve been depressed. Every time I try to diet, I get horrible headaches and I just get SO hungry that I end up binging on food. Now it’s summer and none of my clothes fit, and I feel so bad but I have zero sex drive and my poor husband has been so patient but I know it’s wearing thin. When we do have sex, all I can think about is how my body just jiggles all over the place. It’s gross and I’m so sick of this. Please help, what diets do you suggest? What worked for you? I need to lose weight or I’ll never feel better 😔