Boyfriends daughter, is this behavior okay?

Question

My boyfriend is currently going through a battle with the mother of his child (they have a 7 year old girl). I never get involve in his relationship with his ex because I feel like Its not right.. It’s a back & forth situation and I’ve reached my limit he agreed on keeping his daughter every other weekend but due to the school year ending early his ex wants him to keep his daughter every weekend fri-mon. He didn’t agree to that so now she wants $600 of child support. She claims that his daughter needs so much a month because she is so “expensive”. Mind you we are currently expecting and due in November. I couldn’t agree to that. I told him that we will be needing some of that money for our baby & future plans. In my opinion I think $300 is enough plus his ex still lives at home with her parents so she doesn’t pay bills. This past weekend my boyfriend had his daughter over & before she left home yesterday he gave her $50. As soon as his ex saw the amount she started yelling & arguing with my boyfriend in front of my door where all my neighbors could hear & not only that but his daughter blew up his phone and said he was a bad dad because he only gave her $50 which is not enough. (2 weeks ago he had given her $150). I got very upset and got into a huge argument with my bf about this, I feel like he’s allowing her to act this way and not doing 1 thing about it. This morning he vented to me and said he’s done. He’s been stressed for a while now and needs time alone.

Accepted Answer

Once you have your child, you will quickly learn that $300 a month is just a drop in the bucket when it comes to providing for a child. You’re deciding to get pregnant also has no effect on the amount it takes to raise his other child, either. If you are upset by the amount of money it takes for him to help raise the child he had before you came along, I suggest you either get used to it or leave. He has a financial responsibility to that child whether you like it or not. Let him go to court and have them decide how much he should be paying and get it in a court order so she can’t constantly change her mind. Other than that, it’s not up to you to decide how much he gives to help with his kid.

Answer

Wait a minute here.
So his ex offered him more time with his child, which he declined? And now since she is asking for more child support (to offset the costs of him being a weekend dad), you're mad that the money would be going to his daughter instead of you and your pregnancy?
Not saying everything the ex is doing is right, but holy jesus christ on a cracker.

Answer

Why wouldn’t he want his kid more often though..?

Answer

If you're unhappy with the arrangement, go to court and get everything set in stone. That's all you can do 🤷🏼‍♀️

Answer

For shame on you, expecting him to put his child's needs aside for yours. I'd be very wary about what you expect from him, he doesn't sound like father if the year and you don't sound like world's best stepmom either.

Answer

so he doesn’t want to see his child more OR pay child support?
sounds like dad of the year. smh.
you both sounds selfish imo. what makes you think he’s gonna treat your child any different?

Answer

You need to get it figured out thru the courts so you cant keep going back and forth. 
And for you to say he shouldnt pay 600 in child support because you have a baby on the way is wrong. They are both his children, he needs to support both, not just yours.

Answer

Does your boyfriend have a formal custody agreement with a child support order? I would suggest this to cut those behaviors out. My husband has two kids from a previous marriage and his ex used to try the same things, even with a support order. 
For the sanity of both of you, I would have a formal order in place. And I would have a discussion with the ex about keeping the daughter out of it. It’s not her fault and she’s only repeating what she hears. My husbands kids at 18 & 21 still repeat the nonsense their mother says.

Answer

Everything should be figured out through court so there’s no constant back and forth or unnecessary opinions from either side.

Answer

She can’t decide an amount on her own for him to give her. The courts have to decide that based on both parents income and the type of custody at hand. Sounds like he wants non custodial role, which is every other weekend. Personally I think it’s SUPER shitty your boyfriend disagreed to more time with his child. Imagine how he’s going to be with your baby, probably not very helpful considering he doesn’t even want his daughter that often. When my husband had non custodial rights he took EVERY chance to see the kids extra. Now that we have full custody their mom only wants her weekends, not more time, and it’s hurt the kids. As far as money, he isn’t obligated to give her any legally as of now. But she also isn’t legally obligated to give him any type of time with the child. He needs to go to court to get a visitation schedule and child support order put into place. Unless he makes a lot of money it’s highly unlikely he’ll be paying $600 monthly. My husband makes $65k yearly and when he did have to pay child support it was $750 monthly, and he has 2 kids. But he also provides full medical costs.

Boyfriends daughter, is this behavior okay?

The Top Baby Tracker App: Embrace New Beginnings with Tender Care

The Top Fertility Tracker App: Your Path to Achieving Pregnancy

The Top Pregnancy App: Nurturing Your Journey to Motherhood

The Top Period Tracker for Empowering Your Menstrual Health Journey