I found out two weeks ago i was pregnant. I have one 17 month old already. Just before her, I had an ectopic in my left tube. That was ‘treated’ with methotrexate. After my little girl, this was my first pregnancy. After numerous blood tests and scan, the doctors decided it was an ectopic 4 days ago and gave me a shot of methotrexate again. The next day i called the ambulance late at night as i couldnt breathe, my blood pressure shot down and my body was drenched in sweat. I was taken in with tests done and more scans to be told the methotrexate hadnt worked and that my baby had grown alot more, alongside a beating heart. I was taken into surgery and lost my right tube.

Im on day 2 of recovery after my surgery and I am sore. I am mad at everything including myself. I dont know why. I am

Mad and sad and scared to try again. I dont think i can go through this again, especially with just one tube now. I hadnt realised this before, but i am grieving for My tube alongside my baby.