A little backstory: I'm in my mid-30s and going through a divorce. This man is in his early 40s. He's been divorced for 5 years. I knew my marriage was over last year, but I didn't have the courage to end it (abuse was involved). I met this man around Thanksgiving at his job. He flirted with me openly for a few months. We became friends and communicated through email. In February, I told my husband that it was over.

I started meeting up with this man on his lunch breaks (at his job). There was an instant connection. In March, we took things further (sex). Everything was going great. In April, I wanted to have lunch with him, but I stumbled on him having lunch with a female coworker. I now know that they've known each other for years. We got into an argument and he told me things would be "different" going forward. He introduced rules. I wasnt allowed to meet him at his job anymore, I would need to meet him at his house, etc.

We've been sleeping together since March. I have fallen in love with him. He told me that the fact that I'm not officially divorced bothers him, because of what he went through.

His ex wife did some horrible things and he is scarred from it. He has had one relationship since his divorce. It ended badly and he said it affected his kids negatively. He said that they were hurt. His kids are legally adults, but teens. He said that he can't put them through all of that again.

I want to be with him and he knows this. A month ago, he told me that he wants to be with me, he just needs time. It could be a day, a week, 2 weeks, etc. Two weeks ago, he told me that he is enjoying "the single life" and our "arrangement". I was blown away and destroyed. He then contradicted himself. He said that I would need to give him time if I want to be with him. He said that he will have to take things very slowly, because of what he's gone through.

I was very upset. He apologized for hurting me. I ended up making a dating profile and I went to meet someone. The guy didn't show up, but I messaged him letting him know that I had been stood up. He messaged me the next day, wanting to know if the guy ever showed up. He then claimed that he "didn't care". Clearly, he did. He told me that it's my body and I can do whatever I want.

Fast forward to yesterday. I met him for lunch. At the end, I told him that I need an answer (if he wants to be with me). He said that he's taking it day by day. I don't even understand what that means. I asked to spend time with him on Friday night, but he said that he is busy. His kid is having a grad party Saturday. He told me that he needs to prepare for it on Friday night. I don't get it. If he is wanting to be with me, why is he making every excuse to not spend time with me?