Hi

I been at this since 2017. I had a fibroid i was told to wait and not bother it. Then I lost my first baby. Then I was told to try again and I lost my second baby. I went through surgery to remove the fibroids. I waited 3 months before trying again. Then I took 7 month to conceive again but used a trigger shot. Lost that baby because it was blight ovum and now I am starting again. I did one cycle last month with a trigger shot didn’t work. On clomid now. I am so frustrated!!!!!! Scared!!!! What if this doesn’t work.

All I really want in the world is my babies and I just don’t know how to get it. My insurance company is now charging my infertility benefits even though the doctor has not declared me infertile yet. I am very frustrated because there a life time max on those benefits.

I feel like I have done something wrong with me. I am failing. My body is failing. All I want is my children.

Today I had off work and I was triggered by work because my boss message to do something on my day off. After that I was paralyzed and I didn’t want to do any all day. I could not get up. I just cried on and off because of the fear I would loose my benefits because I ran out of chances of trying. I also worry would if it never works. What would my life be like... this has been my dream.

I wish these was more support for women out there dealing with this. I feel so alone and lost.