Terrified of seeking help :( please read!

Evening ladies, I was hoping to share some information on the last 4 years of my ttc journey in hope that someone could put my mind at ease. I know all of our stories are so different but i would really appreciate any advise or success stories from anyone that has been through similar circumstances as me :)

I'm 27 years old and i had my first baby in 2011, a healthy baby boy. I was very young but my pregnancy and birth were very plain sailing! I decided after to get the copper coil and stuck with it for just under 5 years until having it removed to start my ttc journey.

Now this part i may be judged for but here goes nothing! After a year or so trying me and my partner decided to split.

I didnt start any contaception back up! I had a couple of short term flings.... still nothing! I even had a short stint with my sons father (still nothing). I then went on to meet my current partner! Who i believe is my forever! I gave him full disclosure and he knew how much it meant to me to have another baby so we decided to carry on with no birth control.

Here we are 18 months later and still nothing :( i am devastated. I never thought it would be this hard.

I would also like to disclose that i had a termination 2 years before my son was born but i assumed this wouldnt affect my chances being as though i already carried a child afterward with no problems.

I have been referred to a fertility clinic and we are just in the process of having our bloods and semen analysis to get our first app.

I am so scared of what theyre going to find :(

I've had routine bloods before to check fertility, progesterone, lh etc! And nothing unto ward came back!

I'm certain its me as many men have tried and failed 🙈

Please could anyone with a similar story shed some light on what maybe i can expect or the success you had. We are now both so desperate and i feel ive exhausted my family and friends talking about it.

Thankyou to anyone that took the time to read my essay xxxxx

Lots of dust!

I ovulate tomorrow according to GLOW, please pray for me xxx