Just need to vent

Long story short, my mum wants to come over when baby is born/few days before he is born. But I don’t want her here 😭😭😭 I know I should want her here and I feel horrible about it but can’t help myself but feel like I don’t want her here. I can’t tell her that especially when I know we don’t see each other more than 2x a year (I live in the UK and she lives in Czech Republic) but we never had a ‘good’ relationship. I’ve cried half of the day today 😩😩😩

Just please no comments about how horrible I’m, feeling down enough ☹️