In your professional or personal opinion??👇🏻👇🏻

Question

How do you know if you have truly forgiven someone?? There has been so many times in my life where I need to forgive someone or even myself.. and while I say I have forgiven them... it's like i still cant 100% say i feel the weight of it being lifted off
 Is it possible to forgive someone yet still be affected by what they did? (like I still get really sad/bummed & don't like bringing up an ex that didn't give me closure) Or if I truly forgive is it not suppose to affect me at all anymore? It's so confusing to me sometimes 🙄😪 While I'm SO happy in my current relationship and gave myself over a year to heal from the past one, I still get hurt thinking about it

Answer

In my opinion;
Once you forgive someone, you no longer give whatever they did to you, the power to control your feelings towards them, or how you act when around them. When you have allowed yourself to forgive you will feel it. It will no longer be a factor in that relationship. If it’s still a factor, the incident hasn’t been fully forgiven. 
You can forgive, but not forget and that’s ok. Forgiving and not forgetting are 2 different things. 
Forgiving: You no longer hold the grudge toward them, and you don’t let the incident affect your relationship, or how you react with that person in different situations. 
Forgetting: You let the incident go. Telling yourself it’s fine I forgive them. You put it in the back of your mind. You go without thinking about it. Randomly, for no reason at all, or maybe due to a possible trigger, it surfaces. You then get angry and allow the incident to control your feelings and actions towards that person, because you never actually forgave them. You just let it go for the time being.

Answer

Part of forgiveness for you would be to fully accept you probably will never receive the closure you wanted. Being able to accept it with no hard feelings. 
It’s easy to move on without fully forgiving. I feel like forgiveness is having the genuine ability to not hold any emotion towards someone for what’s been done. Being able to be happy for them and wish them the best despite what they’ve put you through..
It’s hard. Not a lot of people are capable of doing so. But I promise you, when you get there, it’s so liberating.

In your professional or personal opinion??👇🏻👇🏻

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