When breaking up is not an option

Been with my man for 5 years we got engaged three months into the relationship I was pregnant the next month with our first baby girl in a year and a half i was pregnant with our second amazing baby girl.

My work situation started to flactuate Getting pregnant after returning from maternity leave so long story short I got laid off and the whole dynamics of the relationship changed since…

He said don’t worry about money (he makes over 1 million year) he said you watch after the two Picassos that we have here so I agreed I became a stay at home mom we looked and bought a new million dollar home where we were supposed to get married we applied for the marriage license then we started to work on our prenup and that’s where he decided he did not want to get married anymore “I just changed my mind“ is what he said and my world was shattered my health started declining I became depressed when I went to the doctor they found a nodule in my throat (IDK if it’s cancerous because of Covid I cannot test)

Now with the girls 4 and 2 I find myself at a crossroad ,41 .. he keeps breaking up with me getting back together with me telling me to leave to find an apartment and I am losing my mind he is the only human being that I have As far as support financial and family wise (I’m European he’s American)

We are in couples therapy but the therapist said that we cannot be together in the session so we are seeing him separately which raises more flags to the fact that perhaps this is over over!

He is very hands off when he comes to raising the kids he only likes to be entertained at his convenience actually the therapist has mandated that he gives me a three hour break in 24 hours being that he owns his company and he works from home now… He’s basically watching the girls during naptime 2.5 hours. Weekends he organizes them fishing most of the day and he takes these bike rides for over two hours every day he says that’s for him to exercise

I don’t want to sound in denial but I find it a little hard to believe that he’s cheating but again I don’t know he holds all the cards for right now and I don’t know how to build my exit plan if it comes to that 😒