This is baby #2 for me. I’m currently 25+5 and I feel like everything hurts.

I have an insanely itchy vagina that the doctor will not prescribe anything for, tons of cramping, occasional contractions.

I’m exhausted, nauseous and lazy. Headaches, stress etc.

My Daughter is 22 months and is both the best and worst parts of my day.

This is the first time in my life since 16 that I haven’t had a job. However, I am also unemployed due to Covid and have been pushed back and forth by the assistance programs, currently I am not receiving any payments, which is stressing me out.

My boyfriend is AMAZING, incredibly supportive and has even worked out the budget to show me he can carry us, but that doesn’t make me feel better about not contributing.

Especially when I set a plan for the day like clean the house, prep snacks and foods, do laundry, and cook dinner- and then I only accomplish like half of that.

I’m not even a good stay at home mom.

We haven’t had sex in what feels like a million years because my vagina is on fire and swollen or my back is spasming, or he is exhausted from working his ass off.

I’m sorry, this is just becoming a rant, but I am just so frustrated!

Not to mention, my daughter technically isn’t his, he has been in her life since she was 6 months old and has been her only father figure, I have supported her singularly and successfully up until now, and I feel like a failure.

Her “sperm donor” my ex-husband, suddenly is trying to see her and talk with her. He is also a meth user (I left when he refused treatment and was 6 months pregnant) and my lawyer is helping me to fight it, but my state is very for fathers rights despite his continued meth use.

So it’s all just bullshit. He has never taken care of her. Not once in his life.

Whereas my bf is the one who rocks her to sleep every single night, and is her favorite person in the world.

And I can’t even destress by having sex!!!!!

Plus it was 117degrees outside today and my AC was not handling it well. -.-