I had an abortion almost a year ago. it was super hard at first, it tore me apart, along with my SO. I'm 19 and we were not financially stable or even really stable as a relationship. it was the first time we hooked up, we weren't dating yet. the condom broke. so we knew it would be such a struggle and not a good place for a baby to be born. I think about our baby all the time. his name is Douglas 😍 we got so attached to him. and I'm laying in bed right now crying because of the guilt and because I wish I could have him in my arms right now. when my SO and I went Halloween costume shopping this past Halloween, I was looking at all the baby costumes 😍 and he pointed out that we would be picking one out right now if he was here. it just hurts. I'm not sure if I'm regretful because we are not ready for a child in any way but I'm in pain and I suffer every day. I wanna wake my SO up and talk about it but I don't want to be a bother or annoy him. we haven't talked about it seriously in a long time but I've been hurting a lot lately because I've been keeping my pain in. anyone out there who can relate ? I'm just hurting right now