I am at the tail end of a divorce after being separated for 14+ months. I had two children during my marriage, that are almost 3 and almost 4.

I have been in a relationship with someone else since November 2019 and he’s a couple of years older than me with no biological children; something he’s longed for.

Both of us were coming out of 8-10 year long relationships (my marriage and his engagement) so we’re not people who jump around. We truly fell in love immediately and it was a feeling I had never known in my previous relationship.

Despite having only been together for ~ 10 months (living together for 8 months) we both think we’re really ready to expand our family together. I actually had my IUD removed today and we plan to use condoms until we’re 100% ready to try.

We’ve had sit down talks about logistics. Everything from names, to the financial aspect, to maternity leave, to how this will effect my job, me possibly staying home long term, him having to financially support my other two children while I lack an income. We’ve sorted out all the little kinks and truly believe that anything else we face will be just fine!

But, I did everything “right” the first time. I met my husband when I was young, but we got married two and half years later, and then waited another 2.5 years to have children. And somehow he still spent four years cheating me and then I asked for the divorce. I’m hung up on the outside judgement I’ll receive from having a baby outside of marriage / newly divorced. But I also know that even when you do things “right” there is no guarantee that you will last.

I truly envision a long life with my current partner and I feel that now (our ages, my kids ages, successful in our jobs, financially stable) would be a great time to add one more baby - and likely my last!

I need some validation / similar stories / understanding.