Orgasms- is there a middle ground? TMI & Long Post

Ok, so from my experience of sex and self play, I feel like there are two types of orgasm. Female ejaculation (squirting) and a more internal type of orgasm (more fluttery and pulsing inside).

Type 1 (Squirting): I’ve done it before on my own serval times and decided I didn’t like the way it made me feel embarrassed, upset and out of control as well as the physical feeling. Especially when I did it for the first time today in front of my partner! On the upside, it leaves me without the feeling of need but to me it isn’t worth the cost.

Type 2: feels great whilst it is happening but leaves me feeling really horny and needy so will have to repeat the process several times.

So I guess my questions are; is this normal and does anyone else experience this? And is there a middle ground and how do you find it?

As I don’t have the highest sex drive in the world as it is, it doesn’t make me feel very good about myself or having sex. A lot of the time I will satisfy my other half but not orgasm myself which I’m ok with but he (very sweetly) wants me to have my happy ending too!

I have a good understanding of human biology and how everything works, but sometimes I hate my body. I am very confused!