I need help

So 2-3 weeks ago I thought I made an appointment with a psychiatrist through telehealth. The appointment was supposed to be this weekend but I've found out that it was either canceled or I didn't do it right and it wasn't scheduled in the first place. My depression has been bad, but increasing daily. My home is a wreck, im failing at work, I'm failing my personal hygiene and an overall mess. I don't think it has ever been this bad and I'm concerned for myself. The worst part about this is knowing I'm failing, seeing that failure and how it's impacting everyone around me.

I'm frustrated all the time, literally have no joy, genuinely feel dead inside. I lost my cat in January who I had had since I was 6, she was 18 and I still mourn that loss everyday. She was my constant throughout my whole life and I'm not dealing with her being gone at all.

I feel like I've asked and begged for help from those around me both personally and in my work life with work related things but I feel so unheard and alone. Now that my appointment isn't going to happen, I don't know what to do. There are none for at least 3 weeks. I can't feel this way for that much longer. I'm not suicidal, but feel my thoughts getting darker and I'm scared. I'm just scared.