How to get over HER after cheating?

Question

My boyfriend and I had been together for ten years, three children together, when I found out he was cheating with a married woman with two children on her own. She knew about us. I saw it in their messages. Now we separated and I'm over him. I don't miss him or anything like that. I'm sad for our children, but that's it.
 But she has a common name, think like Jessica, and everytime her name comes up I hurt. I get upset and it affects my day to day life. It's to the point that if I'm going to buy a shirt and the shirt is called Jessica I won't buy it because of the name. I know it's ridiculous, but I dont know how to stop being upset with her. We separated about three months ago.

Answer

Oooo. That’s a tough one. I hated all Kendras for a while. You know what? It’s been 10 years, and it’s still hard. I hear or see that name, and I think of her ugly ass... bug eyes. 
It’s normal to feel this way. I don’t really have any advice. I’m sorry the name had to be a common one and not something more original like SwampAss since she was aware of being a homewrecker and still perused. Trying to make you laugh here. 
Honestly, it will take time. You don’t have to buy the shirt, but try not to take it out on the awesome jessicas out there in the world. And you know what? He will probably cheat on her, too, at some point.

Answer

It’s still very fresh. It’ll get better. I’m sorry this happened to you.

Answer

You have to come to the realization that it’s just a common name and even though it triggers your memories, you don’t have to stay attached to the negative association with that name. You are giving her name more power than it deserves. So when you feel triggered that like that, just say to yourself, her name means absolutely nothing to me. Consciously decide to let it go. Her name could’ve been anything, the name is not important.￼

Answer

It’s understandable 💖💖 don’t be hard on yourself.
It’s also still very fresh like the other commentator said. 
Keep reminding yourself there’s nothing special about her. She’s just another woman who didn’t have the self esteem to tell a married man no. She’s not better than you. She was just available. 
It will get better with time, I know first hand 💖
Focus on your name and how you kicked your cheating husband to the curb. How amazing your name is as a human and mom. Lift yourself up so much you won’t have time to care about the basic Jessica’s of the world 😂💖

Answer

Keep your head up! This is still very fresh and it’s normal to feel the way you are feeling. You need time to heal. ❤️

Answer

I know this might sound counterproductive but, I would say you should try to immerse yourself more with that name until it loses those memories you attached to it. 
I have done that with songs that I’ve heard and that reminded me of an ex. I try to listen to it more and create different memories. Hope this helps!

Answer

Think of a positive “Jessica” like a tv character or something that you like, force yourself to think of that whenever you see or hear the name and eventually that will take over as the first thing that comes to mind!

Answer

I'm a similar place...the name I can't handle is Z, ends with an E, and has "bitch" in between. If it's anxiety inducing and bothering you day to day, it might be worth talking to a therapist about if you're able, or just venting about it to a trusted friend (not the same, but even still talking is good.) "She doesn't have to mean shit. You're too good to be wasting another thought on her." Sometimes it helps me to think things like that when I start getting in the anxiety loop.
Have a beautiful day, and keep healing ❤

How to get over HER after cheating?

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