Is a 1 or 2 grade gap better between kids?

Question

We have an early August birthday and a March birthday. Were trying to decide if we should start our first daughter in school at 5 or hold her back a year until she's 6 but then theres only be a 1 grade vs 2 grade difference between her and her sister. I know the pros for kids waiting until they are older vs starting young but can't find much on the sibling dynamic of having a 1 or 2 grade difference. Is there more competition? Are they closer? Do they have the same friends? If anyone has experience either way thatd be greatly appreciated.

Answer

I wouldn’t hold a child back a year on account of sibling dynamics, only if they truly need e tea time to develop maturity for school which even in that case often times being immersed in it will help. Previous kindergarten teacher here. Sometimes the youngest kids do the best it’s all about their preparation at home not about age.

Answer

My younger sister and I should have been 2 grades apart but my parents started her early. I live my sister and we are very close now but that was a sore spot for me for many years in school. She was 21 months younger than me and her birthday is in October but because of my parent’s work schedule they got permission to start her in kindergarten two months before she turned 5. I was of course a brat kid but I was always annoyed that she wanted to be friends with my friends and do all the things I was doing in school and she would often say that “we’re only one grade apart” as a reason for her wanting to do something she was obviously too young to do. I didn’t feel like I was able to have a school experience (especially high school) without her tagging along. I would recommend a two year grade difference so your kids can develop their own friendships and become more independent from their sibling.

Answer

At least for you, I think 1 grade would be more convenient. Then it’s less time we’re they’re at separate schools.

Answer

I went to school with lots of people with siblings 1 grade apart- they had separate friends and it didn’t really seem like a big issue. There was one sibling set though that were both in my grade because the older one repeated. I definitely would not do that. He constantly got questioned about whether they were twins, why he was older, etc. I think it had a big impact on his self esteem.

Answer

Honestly I would see what your child is ready for. If she's ready for school, allow her to go to school. I wouldn't consider doing something depending on another child, in my mind, that doesn't make sense. It sounds like holding back her intellectual potential for the sole reason of comfort (hers, her sibling's or yours).. Seems a bit ridiculous?