Hey everyone, I’m having a really hard time right now and was wondering if anyone has been in a similar situation and could offer any advice. Also I’m so sorry for the repost, I didn’t know where to post this. I can delete the others.

In April I moved 1,400 miles away from home. I was severely depressed at the time and my lease was up and I just needed a change. The move definitely pulled me out of it and for months I was actually happy for the first time in years!

I even met someone shortly after I got here and we’ve been dating for a few months now.

Over the past few weeks I’ve been getting extremely overwhelmed and depressed again. I’ve started having panic attacks in my sleep and nightmares and just wanting to sleep all day to avoid reality.

I’ve realized that I’m extremely homesick, but it took 5 months to hit. It’s been very hard being down here because obviously with Covid I haven’t been out going lots of places and making friends. My boyfriend is the only person I really know and although I do see him everyday and he spends most nights with me I miss being able to go hang out with my brother or see my friends and family. I literally don’t have anyone else down here. I’m very close with my family and I miss them 😢

I’ve gotten to where I feel like an absolute wreck about this. I’ve thought about driving home to visit my family but it’s a 20 hour drive one way which stresses me out and I can’t fly. I also worry that once I get there I won’t want to come back down here. That scares me because I really love this little town and I’m in love with my SO, I’m so happy with him and it really feels like I finally met someone who genuinely cares about me after how terrible my last relationship was.

If I stay up north we obviously won’t be able to stay together because I know he won’t want to do long distance and I don’t know how often I could see him.

I don’t know if the homesickness will get better or why it took so long to hit. And I know covid is probably making this worse since I’m so isolated, I literally spend EVERY single day just in this little apartment.

Please help, any advice or suggestions are welcome. I have pretty bad anxiety in general and I’m just feeling so torn up about how to cope with this.