Maybe postpartum depression?
Just had my baby 6 days ago... & before I had her I had no sleep for 4 days and then went to have to push my baby out... the next day my fiancé left me at the hospital all day until 10pm that night so he could finish things in the house for the baby(which I had been telling him to do for months and he procrastinated)... & being a FTM I couldn’t go to sleep even when she was asleep because I just needed to make sure she was okay. & when he was there he wasn’t much help... I felt annoyed and alone because he’s scared to change her diapers or feed her...
So now we are home and I just feel so not myself. I just want to have a little time alone. I have to do every feeding, every change and he gets to just enjoy her.. I’m dealing with the crying and still no sleep. All I wanted was to get my nails and feet done today to relax... I asked my mom if she could come watch her because she took time off for a while so she could and she said no... she hasn’t been much help either... & my fiancé told me to go and I was.. until I changed her and fed her and put her in her bassinet... he’s in the other room putting cabinets together and now I’m just over it. I’m not going anywhere. I can’t go somewhere and my baby is in the other room while he’s working. That just terrifies me. So I’m going to sit home.
His sisters bday is tomorrow and she wanted me to come out with them, but again my mom denied coming to watch her for me, and he said he will but again he won’t watch her properly so I think I’m just going to cancel on that also. I’m just depressed because I just want a little time alone and maybe some damn sleep or something but I just can’t get it.. idk maybe I’m just crazy. 😣