So with AF showing her ugly face again this month, i'm out again. I sent my SO a message advising of my disappointment to which he replied "well thank god, I don't want to keep trying. I have changed my mind and don't want a 2nd baby" (1st child is 4). I am gutted to say the least. After our first baby he said he didn't want any more EVER! I was so upset, but gave up asking and forced myself to be happy with one. After a couple of years he started to change his mind (I was so happy). I would love at least 2 kids and kind of wanted them close together, but was happy to wait until he was ready.  - then we started trying  at the beginning of this year, every month and no baby. Our first was conceived in the first try so all these months of nothing have made me even more anxious and upset. I feel the age gap is just getting bigger and bigger and I'm getting too old (31) it's horrible. We bought our first home back in August so I know that was a little stressful for hubby, but now he is adiment that because it hasn't happened we can't try anymore. He told me to go back on the pill or he will get the snip. I'm so numb, sorry for the long post I don't have anyone to talk to about this, but just had to let it out.