**potential trigger**

So... i really don't know how to feel. Estimated, I'm about 4-5 weeks along. I haven't seen a doctor yet but got 3 BFP home tests. We have a 5 month old and I always wanted my babies close together. But... and I feel selfish for even thinking this... we had to postpone our wedding a year due to covid and the due date would be 3 weeks before our wedding date. I know our venue only had a couple other dates left for 2021 when we originally postponed 4 months ago which are probably gone now. I want more children obviously and I'm sure I sound like a horrible human for even considering NOT having this baby. But our LO is only 5 months (so they would be 13 months apart) and my mind is just reeling right now. I just don't know what to do. My partner won't be thrilled but wouldn't want to not have it either, so I can't even discuss it with him (I haven't told him yet). I'm ecstatic, confused, shocked, excited and frustrated all at the same time.

**please no insensitive or judgemental comments**