Infertility-related depression🙇🏾‍♀️

Hi everyone.

I’m in a bit of a hard spot here. I’ve been trying to get pregnant for over a year with no success. With it being COVID, me working from home and starting my infertility journey, I think infertility has hijacked my life. I can’t stop thinking about what I did wrong or what I did in a past life to be punished. I can’t enjoy my life anymore. I don’t want to see my cousins or they’re beautiful children. I’m deathly afraid of family events. And I fear my partner will get tired of the process of everything since he started this same journey with his ex-wife. I’m just all around afraid and depressed. How do I enjoy my life with this heavy feeling on my shoulders of not being a mom like I always dreamed of? How do I take my life back?