Petty? Or reasonable? 🤔

Question

My current boyfriend was married to a person who was toxic. No he isnt one of those men who is like "my crazy ex its all her fault". She was truly abusive and manipulative and would beat him and destroy his belongings and then when he would walk away to clear his head, she would have their toddler call daddy and cry asking him to come home and ask why he doesn't love him and mommy. 
Awful right?!
Anyways. He has full custody of their now 6 year old. And they are both in a better place.
When he and his ex were together, sometimes they would go away. If they couldn't jump on a plane, most of the time they would have a weekend away to Niagara Falls.
Now he and I are serious and I'd like a weekend away with him. He likes Niagara falls. I don't want to simply because that's where he would always go with his ex. I want to be different and not do the same thing that they did and have our own memories and experiences. 
 Is that petty or reasonable?

Answer

￼In my opinion, it is petty. You don’t need to attach the place to another person. That’s your mind creating the negative attachment when it doesn’t need to be there. It’s a beautiful place and many people go there. Not just him and his ex-wife.

Answer

Perhaps he wants to start replacing those memories with memories with you 🤔

Answer

I see both sides. 
If it’s a convenient place for a weekend trip, I’d just go. You don’t have to stay in the same place that he stayed in with his ex. 
If it isn’t a convenient place to take a trip to, it would be a bit odd but at the same time if it’s somewhere he likes it makes sense he’d want to go. 
Maybe compromise and one time you go there and the next time you go somewhere you choose. 
I know where I live, there are a couple places that are popular places for quick trips. I’ve been there with an ex and with my current husband. It’s really not a big deal to me. I don’t care if my husband used to go to places with an ex. It was in the past. Going there now would be the two of us and we’d make our own memories.

Answer

That's reasonable id feel the same way.

Answer

We had a similar situation. My hubs explained that he wanted to go to these places because he loved visiting them and wanted to make new memories with me there. It was sweet and made me realize I was being a little extra about it.

Answer

Its very interesting how new girlfriends come on on seen and have so much to say about their boyfriends ex like they were there... she's toxic,  she's abusive but he was sleeping with her still made kids with her.

Answer

I wouldn't call it petty. I would tell him that I want different memories since he and his ex used to go there all the time.

Answer

Definitely reasonable for the first few trips. But if it’s an area he truly enjoys just make ground rules about discussing what he did with his ex there when y’all do go.

Petty? Or reasonable? 🤔

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