Depression and babies

Joyce
Hi everyone I would really appreciate some honest opinions/advice.
I have depression, have done for 2 years I was getting better but my gramp died in January and I got really bad again couldn't cope was even suicidal. (My dad left when I was 2 so my grandad was essentially my dad) 
Anyway I came off my meds 2 months ago because I feel they aren't going to solve the underlying problem. I have been desperate for a child since I was 16 but have waited I am now 24 and married I have been with my other half for 7 years.
I desperately want a child and am off the pill but I do have one fear and that is that I am not going to cope and am making a huge mistake. Part of me thinks it will be fine as its all I've ever wanted and I will finally be happy once I have a child. But the other half is stressing that my depression will get worse I won't cope and someone will take my baby away (worst case)
What do people think I just really don't want to wait anymore :(